How to Reply when Someone Compliments Your Chinese
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The moment I started speaking Chinese (“ni hao”), I started getting compliments from the extremely generous Chinese people who were thrilled I was even trying.
While things have changed in the last almost 20 years, and I’m no longer such a rarity (lot’s more “laowai” speak Mandarin now), the compliments do keep on a-flowin’.
So how do I reply?
My Favorite Reply
Chinese Person: 你中文说的很好!
Nǐ zhōngwén shuō de hěn hǎo
You speak Chinese so well!
Albert: 没有你的好
méiyǒu nǐ de hǎo
Not as good as you
Recording
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Transcript
Guy: 中文说得非常棒了你。
Your Chinese is really good.
Albert: 没有你的好。
Not as good as yours.
Guy: 咦?!说得很好了!真的。
Seriously?! Yours is super good! Really.
(Click hanzi links for pinyin and word-by-word translations)
Why This Is the Best
I can’t believe it took me over 10 years to come up with this! (My old approach is described in Chapter 59 of my book Chinese 24/7)
The above reply is now my go-to reply every time because of its many benefits:
Humor: I’d say 9/10 times people burst out in laughter or end up with a huge smile on their face.
Honesty: When I get to a native-speaker level, I’ll stop using this reply.
Modesty: It taps into the deep Chinese culture of being 谦虚 qiān xū when complimented.
But there’s an additional element that I love: it turns the focus from me back to them.
Often, they will then answer with:
Of course my Chinese is better!
Well that’s true!
I’ve been speaking Chinese my whole life!
Or something like that, which solves another issue: transition to what to talk about next.
I love to get people talking about themselves, but that’s tough in Chinese culture. Asking “So where do you hail from?” or something like that feels much more natural after the tables have been turned and the attention is on the compliment giver.
I also love how it blows open the modesty topic and I get to hear people genuinely say how much better their Chinese is than mine!
Again, I can’t believe it took me so long to come up with this, I had to share it. Merry Christmas!
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